How to Make things Happen–The Art of Thinking

Have you ever felt so excited to work on something, then got overwhelmed, when you started thinking of “How”?

Like when you had the desire to:

  • Write a blog post or a book because of your compelling story

  • Start your own business

  • Join a club

  • Start investing

  • Meet new people in your community

  • Improve your communication, speaking, leadership, creativity, or any skill

  • Change job

  • Increase your income

Then when you started thinking about the details of how-to do it, you backed out.
It’s overwhelming!

The truth is, this is a common challenge almost everyone is facing. We get caught up in the details and not starting at all. But there are few people who make things happen despite their circumstances.

Would you like to know how?
How to turn your desire into reality despite your busy life or current situation ?
How to not to get caught up with the details and achieve your goals?

If you do, continue to read on!
I’m excited for you to accomplish your desire, but heads up; this would require some work on your part. There is no shortcut, but the good news is, you got everything you need to make it happen, “You”.

I had the privilege to attend my first leadership conference with Paul Martinelli and other great leaders in the John Maxwell Team.

Paul Martinelli, an entrepreneur, who grew his speaking, coaching, and training business into a multi-million dollar said, “We don’t need to know HOW we will get there. You just have to focus on getting there.”

Paul was a high school dropout from a Pittsburgh working-class family. He overcame a stuttering disability and a dim future to rise from janitor to millionaire entrepreneur.

As I reflect on what I’ve learned, I gained so much clarity.  Last year, I made some changes in my life that impacted my productivity. It made an enormous difference in getting massive results in my life personally and professionally. I realized during the event that other successful people in different fields use the same strategy.

Are you ready?

The Key is: To Focus on The What Not The How.

You need to get clarity on what you want to accomplish first. Once you know your “What”, take action. Take the first step.

If you know what you want and focus on "How”, you will be discouraged. The result?
You’ll fail before you even get started.

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Once you apply this in your life, you will be surprised what you can accomplish. It’s been tested by many successful people like Bob Proctor, Paul Martinelli, John Maxwell and many more.

Here are some of my personal stories to give you some idea on how focusing on “What” instead of dwelling on “How” will help you achieve your goals:

1st Rental Property
A few years ago, I decided to invest in real estate. After reading Rich Dad, Poor Dad, I told my husband that we would get our first rental property. He wondered where did I get the idea and how could we even afford it.

But, it was crystal clear to me that we could find the resources despite tight financial situation. We took the first step. We reached out to mortgage agent to see how much we could afford, then take the necessary steps.

Three months later, we got our first rental property. This is the same principle we applied in getting other investment properties later on.

1st Book Published
I’ve always wanted to write a book when I was in grade school. Every time I meet people who write a book, I’m always fascinated by it, but this year, something changed.

When my mother-in-law passed away in 2018 at the age of 80, I realized that we have limited time. That time is now, because tomorrow is not guaranteed. I thought of my desire for writing my story. It was clear to me; I’ll have my 1st book published.

I decided to write my book, thinking that if there is only one person out there that could be impacted and learned from it, it is still worth it.

I started writing in February. Then that first step allowed me to search for the next steps. Connected with other authors, look for the right course, did my research, and learned more about additional steps.

Four months after that my book got published and reached Amazon Best Seller category after two weeks of launch.

In my book,  One Step At A Time, I’ve stated in Chapter 2,  “To get to the point where you want, you must be willing to take the first step of your journey. Take one step at a time and focus on the destination. Plan your next move. Then the next one. Each step contributes to your goal.” If you follow this, you will see positive results in what your goals.

Invest in Personal Growth
I’ve been following few motivational speakers for a while like Tony Robbins, John Maxwell, Joyce Meyer, Jim Rohn and more for a while. Part of me had a strong desire to equip myself for personal growth. 

As I get better, I could do better personally and professionally. I looked up for courses available for personal growth, and in 2017, I joined the Leadership Program with the John Maxwell Team.

Part of the program is to attend the 3-days conference in Orlando, Florida. When I signed up, I thought of my circumstances. I started to worried on how will I manage my kids (toddler and four years old), if my husband would be able to manage them, the finances, etc., but, I didn’t let the details of “how-to” stop me at that time. 

Like other moms, I felt not comfortable to leave them even for few hours. But part of me was so sure that I’m doing this not only for myself, but also for them. I have to be at my best, so I can give my best for them.

Last week, I joined 3100 leaders all over the world. Learning from the best leaders, coaches, and speakers in the marketplace.

All the resources I need for my trip and my family came to me before the event. We had friends to help out my husband to look after my little girls when I was away. I had flexible schedule and joined them for lunch break in those three days.

The day before my conference, my four-year-old daughter told me, “Mommy, I wanted you to enjoy the conference. You are doing this for us.”

I hugged her and said , “I will miss you.”
She responded, “Mom, I will also leave you when I go to school. I do that so I to grow and learn so that’s okay. I want you to enjoy it.”

Our kids look up to us. If we help them to understand why we do what we do, at the right time, they will come to us with full of surprises. If they see us growing and investing for our personal growth, so we could give our best, not only in ourselves but also to our family and to others, we are setting them to live a successful and significant life.

If we focused on “How”, we feel overwhelmed and started to worry too much. By allowing ourselves dwell on that state, we fail before we even get started. We missed out the opportunity of a lifetime; not to live in the state of wonder, where we could explore our strenghts, weakness and resources available to us.

I hope you get encouraged with some of the stories I’ve shared.
I know you have something inside of you, a strong desire to turn it into reality.

Remember: 
The Key is To Focus on the “What” Not the “How”, then Take Action.
Focus on What you want to accomplish rather than How to do it.
Once you know your What, take the first step.
Take one step at a time!

If you see yourself jumping to the details of “HOW”, bring yourself back in the current state of focusing on “Taking Action for that specific moment”.

Now, take some time of what you want to accomplish. Make sure you have the clarity. Then Take the first step.

If you have applied this in your life, I would love to hear more from you. Feel free to share your comments below.

 

STOP SURVIVING! START SUCCEEDING!

We all experience pain in our lives.
Some of us experience more in our past, and it is unfortunate that it affects our present lives.

We are living with our mask on.
Facing life with the character we want to portray but deep inside our heart, there is a question, why did it happened to me?
You just want to run to forget it and escape from reality.

We are longing for explanation.
Instead of growing up with love, respect and joy, we were surrounded by rage, hatred, abuse and violence. And as we grew up, we are just chasing for the solutions for all the thoughts we have in our head.

And we thought maybe I am better now…Maybe.
But…

  • Why I am not happy?

  • Relationship keeps failing…

  • there’s always wrong with what I am doing…

  • Everything is such a mess!

It’s Tiring, Exhausting, Depressing.

But you know what, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
I was in your situation. I know other people in the same boat and I am sure there are more around us.

If you were a victim of your past, it wasn’t your fault.
But if you let your past take your future, then You are responsible for it.

You are still alive. You have survived. You have been surviving for a long time.
You have been surviving. The good news is, It’s not yet too late for you to start succeeding!

Let go of the past.

It’s a simple message but sometimes, this is one of the hardest things to do in life.
But it’s only you who could it, and only when you do, you will be able to embrace the present and the future of your life.

So no matter how hard it is, you have to…Keep Trying!

Until you could totally say to yourself…
My past is past, whatever happened in the past, already happened. I no longer have control in the things that happened but I could do something today.

Never give up, don’t quit in your life!
If you will hold on, and take charge, it will get better and better.

Recovery is not a one time process. Keep going, keep walking, you can do it!

Stop Surving and start succeeding!

IF YOU CAN SAVE SOMEONE'S LIFE, WOULD YOU?

If you can save someone’s life by doing your part financially, would you?

My dad had a stroke on February 2015. My youngest brother brought him to the hospital and was told he needs to be admitted to Intensive Care Unit (ICU).

Unlike here in Canada, emergency situations like this in other countries cost money before they assist you. You’re already fighting for your life, but without money, they won’t even let you in.

“How much do they need to get him checked?” , I asked.
“Around $500 a day, plus the doctor’s fee and medicine, what would I do?”, he said.

My mom was bawling, my brother, who was penniless at that time, couldn’t do anything.
He patiently waited for my decision, while my father was fighting for his life…

I knew they don’t have that money… They just have enough for their daily lives.

I’m here in Canada and they are living on the other side of the world. They need the money so he can be treated. Without it, there is nothing more your doctor can do, they will not even touch him at all.

Although we hear a lot about thriving and not just surviving, in other places, mostly in third world countries, Dying or Surviving are the only option they have.

Kids looking around in the garbage dump to find ways to make money to just cover one meal for their family.

Kids looking around in the garbage dump to find ways to make money to just cover one meal for their family.

When I was younger, I could come up  with so many excuses why poverty is everywhere, and why majority of people live a mediocre life, BUT during this time, when my family was in need, IT DOESN’T MATTER what they did and whatever the reason is.

All I can think of is “How can I help him to survive?”

I was at work when I my husband called me.
“Have you read your brother’s message?”, he said.
”What message are you referring to?”, I asked, wondering how important was it as I came out from my meeting.
”Papa is in the hospital because of stroke!”, He said.
Shocked, speechless.

I was struggling with my own issues. I think I was just recovering from a miscarriage and dealing with anxiety, but I knew then I had to be proactive and do what I could to help.

I wanted my father to survive!
I have no control over his life but I will do what I can to help him to survive!!!


I prayed, talked to the people who can help, spoke with the doctor, begged to let my father get the treatment needed BUT in the end, I was told, it is policy. Cash is needed before we make any assessment…

SO, without hesitation, I said… “I’ll find a way bro.,  Let’s get him checked and do what’s needed” and sent the large sum...

Where did that money come from?
It was the result of setting aside portion of my income years ago for a situation like this.
I knew this day would come… I will not waste the opportunity to do my part to do what I can…

When the money issue got sorted, my father got the treatment he needed. We made sure he got the best doctor and all the support needed afterwards. It wasn’t cheap, but if you are doing this for someone you love, every second he lives is worth it.

There were different resources that helped him survive during that moment.
Prayer, Faith, Family, friends, Medical treatment, Money, all these resources. It wasn’t the money alone, but it had a very BIG role to play.

Without the money, he would not even have had the chance to get checked by anybody even at the most critical stage of his life.

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No money?
Could you imagine how many people got rejected in the hospital because of that?
How many of them die each day because of not having a chance to diagnose in the first place or get the treatment they need?

  • You might be lucky if you have a community at that time that could help you, but if not… what would you do?

Sometimes, we learned things in a hard way. In my case, growing up in a place where you see people fighting for their lives because of poverty open up the awareness at my early childhood. It made me see how every single penny I earn, there is a Bigger purpose.

Even a single penny you have could make a difference in the life of someone else.

Knowing the difference between assets and liabilities will allow you to stay on track to become financially independent and to do greater things you want to do in life.

Money Matters…

  • When you know how to handle it wisely.

  • It does not make you good or bad. However, it will magnify what you are.

  • It is a tool, a vehicle in life. If you are greedy, you will become more greedy, if you know how to use it wisely, you could reunite families together, extend people’s lives, feed the poor or build a company that could create more jobs.Having financial literacy, you will be able to do more great things in life.

If you can save someone’s life by doing your part financially, would you?
It’s never too late to start….

MOTIVATIONAL QUOTES

If you find good quotes, they could motivate you. If you keep thinking about them, they can transform you. 

Here’s a list of some quotes that have encouraged me for years  and kept me going. Hopefully it can transform your life too.

“If you can’t fly then run, If you can’t run then walk, If you can’t walk then crawl, But whatever you do, You have to keep moving forward.” - – Martin Luther King Jr.

“The MAJOR Key to your better future is YOU!” – Jim Rohn

“When you know what you want, and want it bad enough, you will find a way to get it.” – Jim Rohn

“Be the kind of Woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says. “Oh crap, she’s up!” – Anonymous, but i first heard it from Kim Kiyosaki

“Be the change that you wish to see in the world.” – Mahatma Gandhi

“Make your life a masterpiece; imagin no limitations on what you can be, have or do.” Brian Tracy

“The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing” – Walt Disney

“Getting what you want is great, Wanting what you get is greater.” – Eckhart Tolle

“One of the most important keys to Success is having the discipline to do what you know you should do, even when you dont feel like doing it.” – Unknown

The tragedy in life doesn’t lie in not reaching your goal. The tragedy lies in having no goal to reach.
— Benjamin Mays

“I don’t care how much power, brilliance or energy you have. If you don’t harness it and focus it on a specific target, and hold it there, you’re never going to accomplish as much as your ability warrants.”
– Zig Ziglar

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover” – Mark Twain.

“God will turn my test into testimony…” – Joel Osteen
“Let go of yesterday. Let today be a new beginning and be the best that you can, and you’ll get to where God wants you to be.” – Joel Osteen

“Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. God Himself is not secure, having given man dominion over His works! Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold. Faith alone defends. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable.” – Hellen Keller

TIRED OF BEING A VICTIM?

Are you tired of being a Victim? Make a shift from drama to empowerment with T.E.D!

Overwhelmed?

DO YOU FEEL…

  • sick and tired of feeling so small?

  • bored?

  • depressed?

  • stuck in life!

  • scared?

  • insecure that you’re not as awesome as others?

  • deserve something better in life!

  • can’t get ahead in life just because of so many reasons around you….

In short, are you sick and tired of being a Victim? 

A great book I’ve read recently is T.E.D (The Empowerment Dynamic by David Emerald).

It’s a book you can’t put down or stop talking about!
It is very short and a quick read book that will allow you to understand the traps of victimhood, learn the tools to escape from it, make a shift and be a Creator of your own life.

Highly recommended by my mentors. After reading Amazon reviews, and the first 2 chapters, I’m just fascinated the way the book was written. Each page has great content that will encourage you to keep going. I was blown away by understanding different roles we played in life and asked my husband to to read it. He ended up reading this entire book first before me! TED allows you to understand the difference between Victim and Creator, be aware of these different roles, and make a Shift to live a life that you truly deserve, a Creator Life.

Here’s the notes I captured as I go through it:

  1. Finding the FISBe

  • F – Focus of your orientation

  • IS – Inner State

  • Be – Behavior

Your Inner Orientation, your mental standpoint, has a lot to do with the direction of your life.

What you focus on Determines how you act. It affects just about everything that shows up in your life, too. Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) is the direct result of having a Victim Orientation.

Dreaded Drama Triangle – model that helped countless of people see their disempowering roles and understand their situations. These 3 Roles, Victim, Persecutor and Rescuer, shows up in many different cultures are all Victim Oriented. DDT is a tangled web, a person may play any one of these roles or he may vacillate between them…

Your Orientation sets in motion your experience: How you behave in life…

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VICTIM ORIENTATION

  • FOCUS is on a Problem In Your Life.
    i.e Victim focus on Persecutor or Persecutor looks down on the victim and sees that person as a problem

    1. Anxiety – when a problem shows up, you feel anxiety: The inner state of the Victim orientation. Whether mild or intense – gives you energy for action and sparks your behavior.

  • Reaction: How you behave is always kind of reaction…Victim always look at it as fight, flee or freeze.

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NOW, what’s the Opposite of being a VICTIM?

THE CREATOR ORIENTATION

Opposite of Victim is CREATOR.

Ted explained “ Asking yourself what you want – rather than focusing on what you don’t want – is the way of making shift happen between both the victim and Creator orientations and Victim and Creator roles.”

As you keep working on your baby steps, you’ll get where you wanted to be.

The TED* roles of Creator, Challenger and Coach are powerful alternatives to the DDT and increase our capacity to be “at choice” in most circumstances.

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The FOCUS in the Creator Orientation is the VISION or an OUTCOME. Sometimes, the vision or outcome may be completely clear to you. At other times, it may be vague, only a general idea about where you want to go.

THREE BIG DIFFERENCES

There are 3 Fundamental Differences between VICTIM ad CREATOR Orientation.

1. ATTENTION  – It is where you put focus the Attention. VICTIMS focus is always on what they Don’t want. CREATORS on the other hand, place their focus on what they DO want.

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2. INTENTION – In the Victim Orientation, your intention is to get rid of, away from, your problems. In Creator Orientation, your intention is to bring into being, or manifest, the outcomes you envision.

3. RESULTS – Victim orientation are temporary and reactive. Creator Orientation – you’re much more likely to produce satisfying, sustainable results over time. With each Baby Step you take from the Creator stance, you come closer to or get clearer about your heart’s desire.

“It is the baby steps you take everyday, the everyday things you do, that eventually lead to manifestation of your outcome. “

The challenge is…To stay awake to the choices you make everyday and to relationships you cultivate…

Now, it’s your turn.. you’ve already invested time to read this blog. Go and grab the  T.E.D book and make a commitment to take those baby steps needed.

The resources you need to get out of this victimhood is available to you…Are you ready to take the action to make that SHIFT?  Will you take the Baby Step you need? 

MAKE TIME FOR WHAT MATTERS MOST

“I’m busy …. , I don’t have time for ...”, these are the common phrases we usually hear when we need to decide.

I used these excuses for years, until I realized that there’s no such thing as being “too busy”.

IF YOU REALLY WANT SOMETHING, YOU WILL MAKE TIME FOR IT.

I did, and it changed my life dramatically.

The very first thing to do is to get rid of the limiting belief that “there is never enough time.”
Entertaining this thought programmed your mind to be defeated before you even got started. This belief usually comes from living a distracted life, where you are constantly interrupted by urgent things around you.

In the end, we feel that we are living an unfulfilled, incomplete, dissatisfied, and unhappy life.

I gave birth to my second daughter in June. It was planned c-section because of medical reasons. I made sure I got some help while recovering and extra support with my toddler as well.

I also decided on that year to work on some of my personal goals. Quality Time for Family and Invest in a Better Me. 

I was working fulltime on the first five months, raising a toddler, and a newborn, supporting my dear husband, who’s just starting in his new job, recovering from c-section, working on my real estate license, and launching my online business. It was pretty challenging.

Busy? I thought so, but then I realized, when I was single and no kids, I was always up to something.

Most of the time I was working, but in my spare time, I was pretty occupied watching movies, spending time with family and friends, and sitting infront of  my computer, exploring facebook, youtube, etc. Oh and one more thing , dreaming! dreaming to have a business, better job, more income, family…

Realizing I was also “busy” before but in different things. If we equate things that occupy us, then we can always find reasons to keep us busy.

So I crossed out the word busy and started to focus on how to spend my time on what matters most. 

No matter what situation we at right now, we all have 24 hours a day.
But the question is, HOW are you spending every second of your time?
What are your priorities (if you even have one) ?

As I look back, I have no regrets and I’m glad I’m on track on my priorities for this year.  
Keeping the balance between having quality time for my family, myself and achieving my goals is such an accomplishment.

WAS IT DIFFICULT?
NO, but it was challenging and not comfortable
.

To achieve what we truly want to have a better life, you need to be willing to be uncomfortable.

I also had my challenges, but with these, I grow more.Couple major things I learned:

Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it.
When you fail, what did you learn, and did you get up and try to make it better?

All of us have 24 hours a day but the question is how are we spending every second of our time? What are our priorities?

If it’s important to you, you will find a way. If not, you’ll find an excuse.
At the end of the day, it’s not about having the time, but “Making Time”. It all comes down to your priorities… asking yourself, how badly you want it.

What are the things you want to accomplish?
How badly you want it? It is still not too late to make it happen.

THE 70-10-10-10 RULE

There are many strategies you can use to be financially independent. One of the simplest strategies is the 70-10-10-10 Rule.

I first heard of this rule from Jim Rohn, on his “Financial Independence” book. It opened my eyes and gave me a different perspective on how to handle my finances.

WHAT I ACCOMPLISHED IN 70-10-10-10 RULE?

  • Build my emergency fund

  • Increased my savings

  • Continue to practice my faith by giving consistently

  • Do whatever I want! (travel, fly my parents, support my family, and to have some fun!)

I have been applying this rule in my life. Not easy at first but doable.
Consistent action to give portion of my income allowed me to experience the power of sowing the right seed and reaping at the right time.

Let me tell you a short story. I was working in I.T for almost a decade, when the company I worked for started to lay off people. Despite of the critical situations, I wasn’t let go.

I even received promotions, unexpected bonus,  which was almost 2 months paycheck, and increase almost every few months.

The bonus, I thought was a mistake because of the situation of the company, and I had someone deposit someone’s paycheue into my account in the past. So, I checked with H.R.

Then, she confirmed that it was for me, Performance Bonus, where no document, or discussion prior to that happened.

So grateful for what I received, I thanked my manager right after that. There were no discussions prior to that but I’m 100% sure that approval happened on management level before it comes to my paycheque.

Consistent habit of setting aside portion of my income opens more opportunities for me to receive more blessings in my life.

If you haven’t heard of Jim Rohn, you are missing out. This man has changed many lives including the famous American author, entrepreneur, philanthropist and life coach, Tony Robbins.

Here are some of the highlights from his book:

1. Financial Independence is a worthy goal.

A lot of people are having issues with financial independence because they have some moral issues that are confuse in their mind like the value of money, the danger of money,etc.
Mr. Sheof (Jim Rohn’s mentor) said, Why financial independence is a worthy goal?, Once you get money out of the way, you can’t believe the other dimensions of your life that you could work on… you have more time to work on other projects and you have the freedom to be with the people you want to be with.”

2. If you could do better, should you?

It is true that good life is not only about money and success. However, if you educate yourself more about life, you’ll see that money has a huge role. A good question to ponder is: If you could do better, should you?

Most of the time, people choose the lazy way, and that is just to survive. If you could give a better life to your family, to your kids, should you?

You may hear “I would rather to spend time with my kids, with my family than to work”. The response seems to be I’d rather spend more time with the kids, with my family than being in the office, BUT, what are you doing to make it happen? If you aren’t spending time to improve your self, your skills to be financially independent, you will be forever employee. You may not have that option to spend more time with your family.

If you could at least start with a plan, and ask this question again to yourself…If you could do better, should you? And work towards that plan. It’s not the amount that counts, it’s the extend of your value that counts…Financial independence is a worthwhile goal.

2. Financial Independence depends on the plan you have..It’s not so much of what you earn, it’s what you do with what you earn..

To achieve this, it is very important to understand that this will take time, planning and execution.
It doesn’t mean that you don’t need to work anymore but it gives you some options to have the freedom so you can enjoy your life and work on the things that matter to you.
Jim Rohn who have touched the lives of many people shared a simple way to achieve financial independence.The 70/30 Rule or 70-10-10-10 Rule.

This is also highlighted in another great book, which is highly recommended by  Warren Buffet, Robert Kiyosaki and Jim Rohn, “The Richest Man in Babylon”.

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  • Learn to Live on the 70% of your net(after taxes) income.

  • Tithe/Give 10% of your income – Majority of successful people strongly believe about the importance of sowing and reaping…As you learn the importance of sharing and giving, God and the universe or whatever you believe in will open the doors for you for more blessings…

  • Save 10% of your income. – For active capital, for education for specific knowledge that will improve yourself to start and run a part time business.

  • Invest 10% of your income – For Passive income like investing in real estate, stock, mutual funds, etc.

This is just a guideline when you are starting, as you develop your assets,  and based on your life circumstances, you can adjust how much you put in each category.

NOW is the right time to work on financial statement

  • To know where you are going, you need to know where you are.

  • Be delighted in decreasing your liabilities and increasing your assets

  • Pay your bills with enthusiasm

  • The big part of what you do is your attitude about it..

  • It’s not the amount that counts, it’s the attitude and plan…

By applying these principles, you’re on your first step to be in control of your own finances.

What’s the financial strategy you use to achieve your financial goal?
If you don’t have one, it is never too late to get one!



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